Gaelen Rose
As I sit down to write about Gaelen’s birth story, this verse from Proverbs comes to mind – “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” (Prov. 16:9, New Living Translation) This birth was not like anything I had planned, or even expected! But the Lord God was in control the entire time.
Looking back, I now realize that labor began the night of the 9th; which was Thursday. I woke up and told Doug that I had not slept well because my back was hurting. It had hurt so much during the night that it was difficult to walk to the bathroom, but I was still able to sleep most of the night. By Friday morning the backache was gone and I felt fine. I went about my day, considered if I wanted to go to the store to exchange some baby items, and decided against it, I felt that I had enough to do at home. I sat in the kitchen most of the day at my sewing machine and made wool soakers for Gaelen. Sometime between lunch and about three in the afternoon, I began to notice that the contractions I’d been feeling sporadically were becoming more regular. Even though they were not much worse than the Braxton Hicks I’d been having for months, I decided to call Kathy and let her know. Kathy was on her way out of town. I knew she had planned to be away for the weekend, we had talked about it at her last visit on Monday. We agreed that out of all the ladies that were under her care, I would be the last one to go into labor over the weekend, as I wasn’t due until the end of the month.
Kathy advised me to drink some more water and then see how I felt. I did that, but the contractions kept coming regularly, so I called her back at 5pm to tell her. She asked me to sit down and rest and see if they stopped. I did that, and they did slow down substantially. We talked again just before 7pm and Kathy felt that I wasn’t in labor yet and I agreed.
Doug and I put the girls to bed and I started getting ready to go to sleep too. First though, I struggled to put on a waterproof mattress cover on our King size bed. My back was killing me while I did this, but I wasn’t having any significant contractions. I felt that I just needed to get off my feet and rest and then my back would feel better. I went to bed about 10pm and fell asleep easily.
I’m not sure what time I woke up but when I did I was having contractions that were more uncomfortable than I had had during the day and my back was hurting through them. I wanted to wake Doug but knew he was tired so I just suffered through them by myself for a while. I think I got up to use the bathroom once and that was excruciating.
Eventually I had to start applying pressure to my back and I was moaning through the contractions.
I woke Doug and asked him to time them, but before he was able to I felt that I really needed to have a bowel movement and he helped me to the bathroom. AS SOON AS I SAT DOWN I started to howl and felt like bearing down with the contraction. I still did not realize what was happening! I actually wondered if I had the stomach flu!!
Doug called Kathy – I remembered her cell number, which was amazing because I’m usually terrible at recalling numbers. Doug handed the phone to me as another contraction started so the first thing Kathy heard was me howling like a wounded animal. She said something like, Paula – why are you making that sound? And I told her that my back was killing me, and I felt like I needed to have a BM and I was sitting on the toilet and I was feeling an incredible amount of pressure. She said, but I thought the contractions had stopped? After listening to me howl for a while longer she said, you’re going to have this baby. That’s when something clicked in my head and I realized that I was getting ready to push! Up to that point I did not realize I was in labor at all.
I was chilled and then getting hot and sweaty, and my water broke, conveniently while I was still sitting on the toilet. Kathy asked if it was clear and it was. Kathy asked if we wanted to go to the hospital or if she should call her daughter Jennifer, and her assistant. She was concerned that Jennifer might be snowed in. (Kathy was snowed in also where she was and could not have made it back in time in any event.) Kathy asked if we’d had a chance to watch the birth videos she had lent to us; we had not. But Doug said that he felt we would be fine at home and I certainly did not feel like getting in the car to drive anywhere at this point. Plus it was midnight and our girls were fast asleep in their beds.
I pushed on the toilet for about an hour. But it didn’t feel like I was making any progress. I had a feeling though that Gaelen was posterior (because the back pain I was having was awful) and so this didn’t discourage me. My last baby was also sunny side up and I had pushed for 2 hours before my OB used the vacuum device to help her out. I instinctively knew I had more work to do. Unfortunately though, I was using every muscle I had to push, and my arms and legs were already feeling like noodles.
I asked Doug to call my friend Laura and ask her to pray for a quick delivery. Doug was so calm that he was actually chuckling to Laura as he explained our situation. He was great through the whole birth; I could not have done it without him. The assistant showed up (she’s also named Jennifer) and she was a very calming addition to the room, and then Jennifer, Kathy’s daughter, came. I was glad she was there; I felt that she would be a big help, and she was.
I had been alternating positions in an effort just to get more comfortable, and Doug was rubbing my back, which helped a little. We were on the bed by this time (I’m certainly glad I put that mattress cover on!) Jennifer suggested I squat through a couple of contractions to bring the baby down which I did only thanks to Doug and Jennifer the assistant. I could barely make my arms and legs move anymore. Then I laid back against the pillows and Jennifer prayed out loud for Gaelen to come quickly and encouraged me to get angry so I could push her out! I was starting to feel a little fed up, and really wanted her out! So I did my best.
I started feeling a burning sensation and realized that Gaelen was finally making her way out to us but it really stung. I wondered how many more contractions I’d have to push through with it stinging like this, but told myself just to take each one as it came. And then finally, what a relief, her head was out and then her body and she was here!
Gaelen Rose Kittle was born at 2:47am, February 11th 2006; red as a rose with the chubbiest cheeks I’ve ever seen. And she was crying right away. I looked down at her and thought she looked big, but I had no idea how big she really was!
Before I could ponder it any further, Jennifer announced that she needed to give me a shot of pitocin, and she commanded me to stop bleeding. Thankfully the pitocin seemed to do its job. Neither Doug nor I had given a moment’s thought to the possibility of my bleeding after giving birth, so we were extremely grateful that Jennifer had made it out to us. I later discovered from Laura that she had a dream earlier in the week about there being blood all over the light colored carpet in our house and also the image of a vine on which a fruit had died, and another friend also got a word about me hemorrhaging – so they were up praying against that while I delivered. I’m so thankful for their prayers!
With the bleeding stopped, the two Jennifers made sure Gaelen was doing well and she was weighed. We had all made conservative estimates, and we were all wrong. I’m just 5’ 3” and my biggest baby to date had been 8lbs 1oz, but Gaelen was a whopping 8lbs 14oz! I could hardly believe I had birthed such a big baby. I’m glad she put in an early appearance! Even with my midwife out of town, she could not have been more timely. With Doug working for himself, it would have been difficult had she arrived during the middle of the week. As it was, we now had the weekend to rest and recover. Our two other daughters blessedly slept through the entire proceedings! When they woke up about 7am on Saturday morning they discovered that it had been snowing and came into our bedroom to surprise us with this news. We had a surprise for them too! Our three-year-old’s eyes grew wide with delight at the sight of Gaelen snuggled with us in bed. While our 7-year-old demanded to see my belly, I suppose she wanted to make sure it was really her little sister lying there!
So that’s it, the story of my homebirth, from a woman who swore 4 years ago that she would never give birth at home! I am the biggest wimp I know; yet with God’s grace I did it. Even though my midwife wasn’t there, even though labor was nothing like I expected, even though she was early and we only had one childbirth class and never watched the birth videos! God was in control and worked everything out for our good. And so far she is a very “calm” baby (Gaelen means “calm”).
Would I do a homebirth again? When Doug asked me this, just hours after giving birth, I told him that I wasn’t sure I could ever do it again! After all, I had just had two and half hours of hard work pushing her out. But now it’s a week later and I’m already starting to forget how hard that part was. I have healed so quickly compared to the two hospital births I’ve had and it’s been lovely having her home right from the start. So yes, if God ever chooses to bless us with another baby, I would plan on having a homebirth again. Having this baby has taken us down a road I thought I would never travel, but it has been well worth the trip. Our many thanks to Kathy, and to both Jennifer's, who assisted us the night of Gaelen’s birth. And praise be to God who determines our steps, and whose plans are perfect.
